It's amazing how wise a Disney movie can be!!
Sometimes when we want to move forwards, make progress and achieve our goals we have to let go of the past. I guess its kind of like taking off your backpack (or handbag!!!) emptying out all the stuff that no longer provides value (yes that lipstick that is covered in crumbs, the dried up wipes and the 63 supermarket receipts). It is only then once we have capacity that we can then move forwards and truly achieve our dreams.
Sounds a bit full on....I know .... but please bear with me.....
I am a yes person, I see problems and I want to fix them, I have lots of great ideas and big plans.......however I am only one person....... a person that finds it really hard to ask for help.....from anyone.....at all.
I am also very, very, very, determined and even more stubborn......(apparently)
As you can guess mixing this with 2 children over 3 years, a very busy husband and a fledging business..... well life kind of came to a head.
Kids were rampant, business was losing money hand over foot, marriage.....well we didn't really argue (not that we actually saw each other that much!!) and needless to say I wasn't really putting myself first and I can honestly say I wasn't a great person to be around. I had got to the stage that I was physically shaking all day, every day...... not flash for a Yoga and Pilates teacher!
Every week I would try to start eating healthier, exercising better, more time with hubby, more time with the kids, more time working.....nothing really 'worked' and I just physically, mentally and emotionally I could add another 'thing', goal or what ever it was to my plate.
Slowly piece by piece I let go of the stuff that didn't really add value anymore.... the extra trips out to the park with the kids that normally ended with me fighting and yelling at 2 screaming kids- trying to carry 2 kids, a bike, a scooter, control a dog and push the buggy home at 5.15pm at night, re worked and built an amazing team of people that cared as much about our clients as I did, got help around the house and learnt to ask for help when life hit the fan....as it does...no matter what!
Then last week I did the biggest and hardest thing for me......I let go of all the anger, jealousy, frustration and disappointment that I had been holding onto for years against my husband.
He by no means is a saint and neither am I , but sometimes you get to the stage that you just have to wipe the slate clean, and literally start again with clear eyes, open mind and a light heart.
It feels amazing....it is by no means easy!!!
I still catch myself running down the old thought process and have to stop myself dead in my tracks- is it worth getting angry about? Was it even his fault?! What's the best way to manage this ? and my current favourite....How would you treat a stranger in this situation?
All of a sudden I feel lighter, clearer and happier....I even caught myself laughing until I cried yesterday!!!!
Now that I am carrying a lighter pack I can refill it with healthier lifestyle choices and goals and most importantly- with joy, warmth and happiness.....Isn't that what we all want?